Saturday, June 11, 2011

Prologue - Lost (.004)







The heel that was once secured on her foot was now dangling along against the back of Ellyn's ankle. Her non leveled walking didn't bother to help her injured leg. Each limp proved to be ten times as more painful than the previous one. If her leg wasn't enough to worry about, her lungs throbbed each time she breathed in the frigid air. There were moments where she wouldn't bother to breathe just so she could avoid the hell that awaited her. Blood still lingered in the corners of her mouth, yet there was no raw ache. Her face had almost grown immune to this kind of abuse, but the gash burned relentlessly due to the salty rain water seeping inside. The bottom of her foot sank deeply into the soggy wet earth, causing her to nearly fall. Crickets and earthworms crawled through the blonde's toes, frantically trying to escape the vicious down pour. Ellyn had already given up on trying to upkeep her makeup. The eyeliner around her eyes had taken the place of the fallen rain drops, and the few tears she managed to let escaped from the corners of her eyes. Now, black drops of liquid carelessly fell down her cheeks and onto her shirt, which too, was shot to hell. Every inch of her body was frozen. Walking in the forest, alone, in the rain, during the month of November would be on the list of things only a fool would do.




From what she could see, there was no evidence of solid ground or any livable shelter. The adrenaline pulsating through every vein in her body had hidden the fact that she ran into the harsh rain and freezing cold weather after just throwing herself from a moving car. There was no exact destination. There never was. Anything other than being in the presence of him was heaven at its most essential form. Death would be the only consequence if he found her. And as far as she was concerned, she wasn't about to die. He wasn't about to take the last and only thing she had left.



Walking blindly ended up making her escape from the dark shadows of the unforgiving forest a failure. The deeper she sunk into the trees; the chances of her evasion from the darkness grew even slimmer. She had come to a point where she couldn't tell the difference between darkness of her eyelids and the blackness of her surroundings. There were no specific signs alarming her to take a special route that would lead her back to civilization. Branches and leaves crumbling under her bare foot caused Ellyn to jump on numerous occasions. Suddenly, the sound of wings slicing through the blackness was no more than a foot from her face. That was the final straw that broke the camel's back. Ignoring the pain in her leg, she broke off into a stride. Unexpectedly, the sounds of wildlife grew louder in her ears to the point that she thought that losing her mind was the next stage.



Her feet finally stopped moving. Within the distance, she could see light. Not manmade. Natural and real. The moon. Ellyn debated with her subconscious mind and finally walked closer to the light. The blonde woman gasped at the impeccable beauty of the moon's reflection in a shallow pond. Adjacent to the pond was a small cottage.





Telling the difference between whether the random cottage that sat in the middle of the forest was real or if overwhelming delusion had consumed the remainder of her good sense was not an easy task. Walking closer, Ellyn began to understand that she was nowhere near losing her mind. The house was in fact real. Empty and lifeless. New house. New life. She could start over. At twenty-nine, she didn't have much of a choice. For the first time in years, Ellyn's heart pounded for something other than fear. Sanity.


Next--->

16 comments:

  1. Excellent! I loved this! And once again Brava! I love the way you write. This screams danger and I could feel her pain and emotions as she made her trek through the scary forest. I do hope she finds respite and can make a new life for herself.

    Goldilocks and the three bears? I'm very intrigued!

    Great start! I can't wait to see the "him" she is running from! It must be bad with the way she was so desperate to escape so deep into the woods like that.

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  2. Wonderful start! I commend you on doing this and SimFic50 at the same time!

    That cottage looks creepy and I am worried Ellyn won't get the fresh start she's seeking. If "he" is so horrible, I don't see him allowing her to just get away like that and done see the residents being cozy people!

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  3. Great start. I'm intrigued by the "him" she seems to be running away from.

    Hopefully she does find her fresh start...but I'm guessing warm shelter and nice comfortable bed are high on her list right now.

    Loved the forest/woods.

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  4. Great prologue! The feel of your images complimented the mood of your writing. That sense of darkness and eeriness was palpable. Fantastic writing.

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  5. What a clever story to use! I can't wait to see what you do with this! Ellyn is going to have her hands full, between who she's running from, and who owns that cottage!

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  6. This is just beautiful! The writing is so clear and so evocative, you brought me right in there with Ellyn. I adore the set with the water wheel, and the way you use lighting. Wonderful piece!

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  7. Awesome! I'm intrigued. This is not a story that is often adapted/retold.

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  8. Your writing...It's amazing! So much detail,I love it. You've definitely caught my attention with this beginning. I need to know who is "he" and why is he after her. Maybe she's not as innocent as she appears. hmmm

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  9. I loved your pictures!

    Although with the way you write, you don't even need them!

    I love this beginning.

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  10. Thanks Daisie and everyone else! Sorry I didn't get to comment to each one! I'll get better at that!lol

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  11. Exciting! Who is he!! I want to see!
    Love how your write emotions. It was very raw. Great job! Going to next chapter!

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  12. What a great way to hook someone into a story. Beautifully written! A great job of using the senses to tell how she felt, where she was.
    I hope she finds the fresh start she seeks, away from her past troubles; yet, i have a feeling this cottage isn't entirely "safe either"

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  13. What a wonderful start!! The imagery, the pictures, the way you describe what's she's going through at the moment, it paints a vivid picture and pulls me in.

    I'll be following this for sure!

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  14. Wow! I am seriously intrigued by this. The premise foreshadows so many possibilities and your shots are BEAUTIFUL!! I can't wait to catch up to what's happening currently.

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  15. I know this story has like 26 chapters already, but I just couldn't help to think the woman was going to collapse and die on the spot. A cottage that no one is living in? A little TOO convenient if you ask me. Good job.

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  16. Woah! Such an amazing start, I'm already hooked. I'm a bit late but I can't wait to continue reading on. :3

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